The Root of All Good Marriages: Knowing and Loving God (Part Three)

“Oh, how I love Your law!
It is my meditation all the day.
You, through Your commandments, make me wiser than my enemies;
For they are ever with me.
I have more understanding than all my teachers,
For Your testimonies are my meditation.
I understand more than the ancients,
Because I keep Your precepts.” (Psalm 119:97–100)

We need then to take a close look at what God has to say in His Word about living life the right way and then specifically apply it to our marriages. A lot of different approaches could be taken to do this (the Bible is a pretty big book), but I think one of the very best ways is to take a close look at God’s moral will as revealed in the Ten Commandments.

Why the Ten Commandments?

God’s Word is, among other things, a Law-Book. The word “law” automatically conjures up ideas in our heads, and, frankly, some people, including some Christians, don’t like the word or the concept. That’s too bad. Without “law” the whole world would fall apart, of course. God built law into the world because He Himself is a God who obeys laws, in a sense. That is, He is free to do anything He wants, of course, but He will never violate His own character. God is a law unto Himself. It would certainly be (and is) bad for you and me to be “a law unto ourselves,” but it is great for God. God is holy, and He can never cease to be holy—for God to cease to be holy would mean God would cease to be God. And because God is holy and will always be holy, God’s holiness becomes a “law” in the universe for all time: all that conforms to His holiness is good (obeys the law), and all that does not conform to His holiness is bad (“sin”).

So “law” is good, especially if we think of it as that which conforms to the character and/or will of God. Certainly there are bad laws created by men. And then there are sometimes good laws that are used by bad people or interpreted wrongly or applied badly. But the idea of law in and of itself should not be regarded by us as a bad thing. Law is good. Law-less-ness is bad. Indeed, that is exactly how the Bible defines sin at one point: “Sin is lawlessness.” (1 John 3:4)

That is why I say God’s Word, the Bible, is a Law-Book of sorts. In the Bible is recorded, by God’s own hand, a description of God’s character and the things God likes and doesn’t like. In the Bible God reveals to us His own mind on things—including things like marriage and relationships and how to be a good husband or a good wife. If we follow His law, His ways, His direction, leaning entirely upon His grace in doing so, we will have a much greater chance of having the kind of marriages God designed us for—in other words, good ones.

“Lord God, whose Word is Law and whose Law is our good, teach us what You are like and how we are supposed to be. Help us to hate and forsake all those things that are contrary to Your holy character and to love all that conforms to it. Grant to us the wisdom and knowledge that comes from knowing and keeping all of Your commands, and transform our marriages accordingly, we pray in Christ’s name. Amen.”