Avoiding Sexual Temptation (Part Four)

13So she caught him and kissed him;
With an impudent face she said to him:
14“I have peace offerings with me;
Today I have paid my vows.
15So I came out to meet you,
Diligently to seek your face,
And I have found you.
16I have spread my bed with tapestry,
Colored coverings of Egyptian linen.
17I have perfumed my bed
With myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.”
(Proverbs 7:13–17)

• Don’t be fooled by the “good girl” syndrome or a religious façade (vv. 14, 15). The woman Solomon mentions here came straight from church. There are women as well as men who use religion not only as a cover for their sins but as part of their seduction. Just as Satan can appear as an “angel of light” in order to deceive, so can “a good Christian girl,” seeking religious approval on the one hand while she tempts sexually on the other. And of course, a man can lust for a woman who truly is a good Christian. But you must remember that, were she to live out your fantasies about her, she would be a “harlot,” “adulteress,” “immoral woman,” just the same.

• Don’t be fooled by a false understanding of the gospel (vv. 14, 15). A distorted understanding of the grace and forgiveness of God can trip up man and woman alike. If we find ourselves falling into sexual sin (mental or otherwise), confessing it regularly to God, asking for forgiveness, feeling a bit of relief, and then running out to commit the same sin all over again, part of the gospel message and life is not getting through, namely the part about repentance and holiness. God forgives us so we can live righteously, not so we can have a relieved conscience and then open ourselves right back up to temptation. “What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? Certainly not! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it?” (Romans 6:1, 2) “Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators . . . nor adulterers . . . will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.” (1 Corinthians 6:9–11)

• Don’t be fooled by the accompanying attractions of sexual sin (vv. 16, 17). The smells, the sights, the tastes, the “joy,” the “satisfaction,” etc., are all as fleeting as a wisp of smoke. John Bunyan appropriately named one of his sexual-temptation characters in Pilgrim’s Progress “Bubble.” “Oh! Look how pretty!”—pop! It is a dream, and when you wake up, it may well be too late, you may be in the claws of misery, destruction, and death itself. Instead, look always to the beauties of Christ and the beauty of holiness to which He calls you. Sexuality is beautiful and full of joy but only in the context of faithful, monogamous, sacrificial, and loving marriage. Sex outside the boundaries set by God always, without exception, has a nasty, wormwood bite to it in the end: “For the lips of an immoral woman drip honey,/And her mouth is smoother than oil;/But in the end she is bitter as wormwood,/Sharp as a two-edged sword.” (Proverbs 7:3, 4)

“Lord God, we give thanks this day for Your saving grace, a grace that goes so far as to save us from sexual sin as well as any other. Thank You for the forgiveness of sins in our Lord Jesus Christ and for Your patient longsuffering with us as we stumble along in our repentance. Grant us the grace to believe the whole gospel, to repent fully and desire holiness; give us wisdom to see the emptiness and futility of sexual sin regardless the overwhelming attraction; and make us to despise anything that is apart from Your holy will. Grant us instead, by Your grace, happy homes with happy marriages, and by Your Spirit help us to do the hard work such marriages require. We pray in Christ’s name. Amen.”